Sometimes it’s like working with Eeyore–well, maybe more cheerful than that, but still reserved.
You try your best to engage with that introverted coworker. You encourage her to participate in teambuilding activities. You invite him to lunch. You ask for her input. But no matter how hard you try, they keep to themselves, are hard to read, and come across to other coworkers as standoffish. Why bother trying to engage with them? If that’s how they want it…but wait. Your introverted coworker may be the key to success in that projects, or have some great wisdom to share. So before you give up, try these tips:
Evaluate his or her personality. It’s built into the nature of some to be more private and cautious. This doesn’t mean they walk around depressed or melancholy. They just are not going to be the first ones to jump into activities. They recharge by being alone and quiet, so be careful about expecting (or demanding) them to participate with the same enthusiasm others might.
Mix it up. Teambuilding activities don’t always have to be high energy or require full participation. Try some quiet, behind-the-scenes teambuilding like this puzzle game.
Interact one-on-one. Create opportunities for you to have brief conversations with this person. Do they go get coffee after the big crowd has dispersed? Intentionally wait to get yours then so you can say hello and ask what they think about the latest initiative.
Praise privately. An introverted coworker likely prefers not to be made a fuss over. So if you are doing recognitions, consider leaving a card or give on their desk rather than call them up in front of the entire group.
Don’t shine the spotlight on them. Tread carefully when trying to draw out the introverts during meetings. Try approaches such as having everyone share an idea on an index card and then reading random cards instead of pointing at someone and asking them to respond on the spot.
Have SOME expectations. While you don’t want to alienate the introverts, don’t let them set the tone for every interaction either. Use gentle and well-timed means to draw them out. Even an introvert benefits by stretching beyond their comfort zone sometimes.
Respect personal time. Some teammates have hard boundaries between personal and work time. They resist being required to attend an overnight retreat, dinner, or other off-hours activity. Make sure that if you require such attendance, you make the time extra special by paying for dinner, paying overtime and/or a bonus, or allowing them to schedule a few hours off another day. Follow applicable labor laws and be sure to be fair to all employees.
Be sensitive in timing. Teambuilding activities are great, unless they are required during the busiest part of your month. Your team introverts will soon resent being distracted by the expectation to drop everything to go out to lunch with the boss, even if the boss is paying!
In the end, as the leader, you will have to determine if this employee’s demeanor is something you can work with or not. Remember that introverts don’t enjoy the same things, or recharge the same way, as extroverts do. Expecting them to be a team player is reasonable, but so is being a leader who is thoughtful and wise.
