Whether it’s a company or a local government, you’re simply bound to meet people who are not exactly friendly. This is what happens to people who decide to work in crowded environments. Most of your co-workers will be absolutely fine, but you can expect a few to be always fuming and at the brink of explosion. Fortunately, there actually exist methods you can employ to manage such situations. Here are 7 tips to help you deal with difficult people at your workplace.
Manage your expectations
Sometimes having an honest conversation does the trick. Choose a quieter moment when you can talk to these people about your expectations. You should agree on how to best work together – what you can and cannot do, develop a system for managing urgent issues or agree on time frames. It’s smart to have this conversation early on, not in the peak of panic – approaching potential collaboration problems rationally is your best strategy.
Downplay the situation
This is an excellent approach when things heat up. I found out that by feeding negativity and coming up with big responses, we can only help a difficult situation to escalate. Instead of calling out the person’s behavior with some kind of grand reply, try to listen to them – once they feel understood, you’ll have the situation under control.
Interrupt the pattern
Many people tend to behave like robots at their workplace. There are triggers all over the place and we often react within a story we live in our heads. This is the moment for breaking that pattern – instead of following your usual scenario for replying, try to ask an off-topic question that will distract others from the difficult situation at hand. This way you’ll give yourself more time to approach the situation more proactively and less defensively.
Handle aggression assertively
Sometimes people lose their calm and can become physically or verbally aggressive. If this happens to you, your best course of action is to walk away or say that you’ll put your phone down – and that you’ll return one they’ve calmed down. Nobody has the right to compromise your sense of personal safety by creating these situations.
Assume their perspective
If you find collaborating with a few of your colleagues problematic, you can try this mental exercise and assume their perspective for a moment. What is it that they want to gain through this situation? What do they really want from you? If you were in their situation, how would you behave? This tip will already get you far since we’re all used to considering the world from a single perspective – ours.
See the bigger lesson
Difficult situations or conflicts usually carry a bigger life lesson to be learned. Even if you’d rather forget about what happened, the truth is that every situation of that sort teaches you something – how to relate to other people, how you’re creating conflict or what such conflicts trigger in you. Assume a broader perspective and distance yourself from the situation – there’s something to be learned from every problematic situation.
Be upfront
You’d be surprised to learn how many people aren’t that self-aware and have no idea that their behavior causes problems. Be upfront and explain to them what the issue is or what you need them to do. If a colleague is constantly commenting your contribution, take them aside and ask why they’re doing it. They might not even realize that it was a problem.
Working in local governments, you’re bound to meet people who aren’t exactly easy to get on with, but these simple tips will help you to manage the situation smoothly and gain a lot of knowledge about interpersonal relationships in the process.
